Article first published as I Wanna Do-Over: Growth of Adult Proms on Technorati.

Remember prom?  It was a special, magically night you dreamed about for years — yearning for your chance to indulge in expensive clothes and the attention of hairstylists, manicurists and make-up artists.  You had the chance to feel like a queen for a few hours.  Only your wedding day was more special.

Well, you might get a chance to re-live prom if you live near one of an increasing number of cities hosting Adult Proms, according to the New York Times.  Adults, mainly in their 20′s and 30′s, but some into their 60′s, are attending adult proms; complete with the crowning of a King and Queen.  Many things about these proms are the same as the ones we went to in high school — a band, an elegant dinner, and everyone dressed-up in new finery.  Its a chance to break up the humdrum of lives full of other people’s needs and be a little self-indulgent for a change.

Some things, of course, are different.  Alcohol is no longer forbidden.  And, the chances of getting lucky are pretty good.  But, some of the bad memories of prom are also re-lived.  There’s the table of women sitting there hoping someone will ask them to dance, the guy who leaves his date searching for him all night, and the inevitable let-down when its all over and you have to go back to reality.

Why are adult proms increasing in popularity? For some, an adult prom is a way to have the night you never got or to re-live that special night.  Adults may look back at prom and wish they’d done things differently so adult proms give them a chance.  Others are late bloomers and feel more ready for prom now without earlier inhibitions.  Plus, it’s a great stress reliever to just go out and have some fun.  Most raise money for charities, so it’s another way to give back to your community.

But I think the biggest reason for the growth in adult proms is we have so few real connections in our lives that we grow nostalgic for high school days when we were surrounded by friends every day.  In his book, Bowling Alone, Robert Putnam chronicles the decline in community engagement — the block parties, church socials, garden club meetings, and, yes, bowling leagues – that filled our days with activity and interpersonal relationships.  Now our days are full of driving carpool, running errands, and watching TV.  In an increasing number of households, families don’t even watch TV in the same room and often don’t eat together.  Communication is exchanged via text messages and Facebook status updates.  We’re social creatures and need association with others.  Adult proms give us a chance to re-live a time when we were constantly surrounded by others and enmeshed in our real social network (before Facebook). For 1 night we can pretend our lives are full of rich social connections.

Unfortunately, it’s not so easy to go back to that earlier experience and, like Cinderella, we wake up the next morning in the same isolation we lived before our dream night.  Unlike Cinderella, however, there’s no Prince to find us and make our dream a constant reality.  Instead, we have only ourselves to make our lives what we want them to be everyday.  We need to take the first step — join a club, schedule lunch with friends, plan a group trip to a nearby area, or form a bowling league.

What will you do?